Medical Advice
by Wicked R
Summary: Drunken Damon, sympathetic Meredith, no particular plot leading to Delena, hints of pastDalaric.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Medical Advice

Disclaimers: I don't own any supernatural powers or anything else to do with TVD.

Genre: hurt/comfort as usual.

Set: Nonspecifically somewhere around the beginning of season 3, but nothing to do with it as such.

Summary: Drunken Damon, sympathetic Meredith, no particular plot.

Matt sat another bottle of whiskey down on the bar in front of Damon, discreetly removing the one that the vampire had in front of him before, almost empty. It was common practice by him and Jeremy at the Grill to try to conceal how much vampires who came into the pub restaurant more and more often actually drank, it could've been suspicious how they never really got that drunk. Damon had been sitting on his regular seat for hours now, staring at the empty space Alaric used to sit, which meant several bottles of spirits by now and Matt had started to wonder if he should address the dark vampire, disregarding Damon's usual natural animosity towards him. Not much of what had happened to Damon was his fault he felt, he had suggested Elena should choose Damon. Matt couldn't help thinking that if Elena would've taken his advice, they wouldn't have been by the bridge at all and her turning would've never happened. Having a lull in the business given the later hour, he stood close by at the other side of the bar, working up courage to talk to the vampire before he actually put out a hand and squeezed his shoulder, "are you all right?"

Matt was quite relieved in some ways to see that Damon didn't quite react very quickly and in an aggressive manner. It took a few seconds for him to raise his lolling head, eyes taking time to focus on the bartender. Sluggish, unvampirelike."What do you care?" Damon barked back, loosing some of the effect of his intended ire as his words slurred.

Matt shrugged, "just because the whole town is messed up doesn't mean I can't have moments when I want things sorted out."

"And what things would you like sorted out little football player?" Damon frowned at him, "all vampires staked?"

"I would prefer if they haven't existed at all, but since you do, the second best would be them leaving town. But since that's not gonna happen either, third best would be making everyone a bit happier."

Damon raised his eyebrows, "probably somewhat over your league, don't you think?" He raised his glass in a toasting way towards the quarterback. "You'd probably be better off leaving town yourself."

"Same goes for you," Matt countered bitterly.

"You offering?" Damon smirked at him, "cause I usually prefer my bed fellows a little more durable."

"Well, I'm glad you're all right," Matt pushed himself away from the counter at the other side of Damon, "at least as all right as you usually are," he established from his conversation with the vampire.

Damon nodded, swinging his head wildly up and down until it reached the counter, where he left it hanging, "I will be after a couple more of your finest liquor," came the muffled reply.

"Look, Damon," Matt leaned close, lowering his voice, "you can't drink at that rate in here, you know that. People will notice. It's not humanlike."

"Fine." The vampire snapped, grabbing the last bottle he was given. He had enough of being nagged by the humankind anyway. "I will act as if I'm drunk on my way out if that makes you happy," he gave Matt a wide grin and set to put his feet down off the stool, hanging on to it with one hand as it swirled after he moved it, "later buddy," he patted the air above the empty stool next to him.

The barman watched with curious irritation as the Salvatore let his hand move further with the motion of the seat, loosing his support and ending up on the floor in a sottish, no doubt practised, seemingly uncoordinated motion, hitting his head onto the leg of the stool. Matt wasn't sure if Damon meant to shatter the bottle as well, but he doubted the vampire was not fond enough of his drink to do such a thing. So not a completely controlled, show fall then. The young man stepped to the side to lift the counter to get to the troublesome customer on the floor, now well grabbing the attention of the other people in the bar.

"Happy?" Damon grinned at him.

"Not quite," Matt took hold of one of his arms to get him up, "there's a nice mess to clean up. Would you mind helping with the standing up?" He grumbled at the older man who was still in pretend mode, making it hard to manoeuvre him onto his feet. Thankfully Matt had help in the form of Meredith, who abandoned the remains of her late dinner after the end of her shift and moved to offer her shoulder for the vampire to lean on.

"That's a bit too much pretending," Matt frowned.

"I don't think too much of it is pretence," Meredith gave her opinion.

"You don't know Damon well enough," the bartender argued back, "but either way, whether if it's for the other customers' purposes or Damon's, I'd like to get him to his car if he'd cooperate," he suggested.

"Cooperating here!" Damon shoved the boy away from him in vexation, leaning most of his weight onto the doctor instead.

"Ughgh," the pretty woman swayed with him under the extra burden, but managed to wave at Matt, letting him know she was ok to deal with the vampire herself from now on. "Come on, Damon."

"Well, well, the doctoress thinks I need medical attention," he put both his arms around his helper and grabbed her bottom.

Meredith ignored him for just as long as they reached the outside air where there weren't any onlookers. "Damon." She let him go and ducked out from under his arms, which resulted in him making contact with the wall and banging his head again. "I understand that Ric and you didn't have any other good coping mechanisms, but drinking isn't going to solve anything," she sighed.

"Why? I can't get alcohol poisoning," Damon stated.

Meredith raised her eyebrows, "are you sure about that? Your balance is completely off, your skin is cold and clammy and bluish. You're very pale and you hardly taken any breaths all the way out. And I'm sure you're rubbing your stomach for no particular reason."

Damon gave a hollow laugh, "and perhaps the medical signs of alcohol poisoning are exactly the same of those of a very hungry vampire."

Meredith gave him a defiant look, then checked round them and opened her handbag to hold a bloodbag in front of his nose. Damon started back, "what do you carry those around for?"

"I'm a doctor and I take my profession very seriously. A vampire might need my help too."

Damon shook his head at her, "you. One of a kind." He pushed himself away from the wall and took towards the parking lot.

"Are you gonna take it or what?" Meredith pulled the item she held closer to her chest in case somebody could spot it.

Damon waved back at her, not turning, "thanks for the offer darling but not tonight."

"What. Why?" Meredith trailered after him bewildered.

"Because I'm not in the mood to get sobered up," Damon made it to his car where he lifted the trunk and pulled a bottle from its depth, bumping his head on the hatch on his way up.

"I don't know why you insist so much on things that aren't meant to be. If you were a patient of mine I'd send you to psychiatric consult for your obsessive and addictive behaviour. And even if what you want was going to happen, have you heard of some virtue called patience?" Meredith gave her piece of mind as usual.

"You don't know what it's like to be me." Damon countered eventually once he took the mouth of the bottle away from his lips. "Have you heard of how people end up with their personality traits based on their previous personal history doctor?" He sneered sarcastically.

"So what would you think of therapy?" Meredith tilted her head contemplatively, "would you be willing to attend?"

"If neither Carl Jung not Freud could make me happy, you think you can? Besides, I ate all the others," Damon shrugged, then had a chug from his bottle.

"You talked to Freud and Carl Jung?"

"He was a bit of a pervert, the old doctor. And Carl wanted me to stop drinking, so we didn't click," Damon winked at her and drank again.

Meredith sighed, "well, it was obvious anyway that I cannot send you to any mainstream psychologist anyway. I was just wondering whether if we set up certain times at my office, you would like to discuss the triggers and reasons of your behavioural patterns or even if you just wanted to vent, I could give some of my time? I'm not a specialised psychiatrist of course, but I did have some psychology training."

Damon stood staring at her, swaying and rubbing his stomach abstractedly, "you want to be my shrink? But that's hilarious." He made no attempt to laugh.

Meredith watched him concerned, "how long have you not have blood?" She had taken aboard what he had been saying about what his symptoms meant. "Do you have stomach pains?"

"What is it to you?" He held himself upright by leaning on the side of his car.

"Can it not become dangerous?"

"Not if you're not sweet bunny ripper," he swayed, bottle finished and tossed to the ground.

"I meant dangerous for you, not others. You'd be weak and liable to any attack," Meredith stepped forward, ready to catch him.

"What you doing?" He pulled back, away from her touch.

"Damon, look I promise you I will not try to stop you drinking or make you have blood. I just want to help. Please let me, I hate to see this, you're obviously in pain."

"And how are you going to help doctor?"

"A friend. I could be a friend. And a friend would take you home right now and stay with you till you felt better."

The vampire snorted, "you'd have to become a vampire cause it could take a few centuries."

"I'm sure I can think of something to make you feel better earlier," she opened the car door for him.

The drunken man scrutinized her. Neither her serious tone or her concerned expression suggested she was intending to make him feel better the usual way sometimes women tried. Damon blinked at her, hesitant, "are you sure you're not Rick?" He squinted at her, but let the doctor bundle him into the car.

Tbc


	2. Medicine

Chapter 2: Medicine

Meredith watched Damon lying motionless on his bed, curled up around his stomach. He had been quite weak and needing her help getting up the stairs and now he was even paler and sweatier than before. "Where do you keep the blood?" She enquired.

"You should go," Damon grunted.

"Why won't you eat?" Meredith countered exasperated.

"I might just do that and you don't want to be around for it," the vampire raised his head to look her in the eyes.

"I'm on vervain," she informed him before he could compel her to go, "and I promised I'd stay till you felt better, remember? Anything I can do?"

"Fetch us some brandy, darling," he breathed out, looking queasy.

Meredith sighed, but headed to his minibar and chose the smallest bottle she could find, "you could at least explain this starving yourself game to me," she asserted handing him the item.

"I don't have to think if I'm drunk and I'm not inclined to have many stray thoughts either when my stomach feels as if it's being squeezed from the inside? It's not that hard to figure."

"Any idea how long you're going to keep at it?" Meredith sat down on the edge of his bed.

Damon shrugged, "till the drawbacks outweigh the benefits. Usually I either rip someone's throat out or fall into a drunken sleep. To Rick." He raised his bottle to drink.

Meredith nodded, "and because you were usually with Alaric, the latter prevailed. What else did Rick do to help? Like when you were hurting, physically," she eyed his palm pointedly with which he kept stiffly holding his stomach.

Damon swallowed his mouthful down quickly, a little startled. "I'm not sure what you would think of us if you knew."

"Try me," Meredith encouraged him, "not many things faze me as you might've noticed."

The vampire shrugged, "well, he'd usually ignore it, but when I got him really pissed off with me over it, he'd either try to shove a bloodbag down my throat or..rub my stomach a little. Depends what mood he was in."

Meredith looked at him with a no bullshit expression, wondering if he was trying it on for physical contact. The doctor would've expected a better pick up line from Damon Salvatore so she decided to ignore the comment for the time being. "So you like to torture yourself this way often?"

"Only when a bloody orgy isn't an option," he sighed, "which it often isn't these days.."

"And..and how long do you do it for?"

"Fed up with vampiresitting already?" Damon frowned and looked away, feigning disinterest. "Not long. Usually somebody needs my help and I can't afford being weak and unable."

"It would help everyone, especially yourself a great deal if you didn't keep putting yourself down. Is this some kind of punishment you're intending to impose on yourself?"

The occupant of the bed scoffed, "plenty enough punishment given out by the world and all the people in my life."

"Not me," the brunette reminded him.

"Not you," he said evenly, "why is that? I'm not sure I like being the next charity case of your Samaritan nature after Ric."

Meredith shook her head, "there it is again. You're putting yourself down. I want to help you because you deserve it. No better, non-judgemental friend than you, I knew that for a long time, but now I know how unselfishly, unconditionally you're willing to aid your brother and your unrequited love interest whenever's needed.,you're a beautiful soul Damon. I have no idea why most others don't see that."

"Sounds like you took pity on me after all," Damon jeered.

"I really like you," the woman placed a hand on top of his only to notice how bad his was shaking. "This thing, this blood withdrawal, it's like not being able to take drugs."

"Quite correct," he admitted, a flash of a grimace passing over his face.

"How can I help?" Meredith repeated, frustrated by her inability to use her medical expertise on him.

"There isn't much you can do," Damon closed his eyes and swallowed, both hands cradling his abdomen, "I don't want to talk. Ever. It's best to shut that kind of pain out."

"By inducing another!?" Meredith called exasperated, watching him pale further with a moan. Then on an impulse she slid closer to him and tried to slide her palms under his on his stomach.

"What are you doing?" Damon winced in confusion.

"Am I hurting you?"

"That's a ridiculous idea." The dark vampire would've laughed if he felt any better.

"Well, you said Ric rubbed your stomach for you sometimes so I was wondering if you'd like me doing it."

Damon blinked a few times, trying to read her expression before answering, "go ahead," he sighed.

"But you need to remember I'm not doing this for any sexual favours or gratification received by either of us," Meredith established weightily before having a feel of the rigidity of his abdominals. She didn't think he was too cramped up, but that didn't mean he could not have had any discomfort deep inside. The doctress started to draw soft circles round his bellybutton, slowly widening her circle, then alternating her hand movements between small and bigger traces and she dug the heel of her palm in a little whenever she was trailing over the area she knew his stomach, the organ was situated.

"Meredith." Damon blew the air out pointedly, voice rigid and strained.

"Something wrong?"

"I'd appreciate if you stuck to the upper part of my midsection," he snapped badtempered.

Meredith pulled her hand back abruptly as if burnt. A glance in his trousers' direction told her she had ventured too far. "Sorry," she mumbled, blushing slightly. "So," she started, hoping to make him forget male instincts, "tell me three things you like about yourself."

"In Maslow's or Carl Rogers' terms?"

"Don't tell me you knew them too."

"No, but I went to university. Got a degree in Philosophy and Italian, and a PhD in Psychology."

"Oh," was all Meredith could manage for a while, "so you didn't only go there for the sorority girls."

"There are things I keep back for those who deserve to know about me," Damon fingered her hair. In the proximity of a beautiful woman, it was hard to remember they had an agreement that didn't involve literally burying himself into her for momentary comfort and go for the benefit of something deeper and more meaningful instead. But old habits die hard and he raised his head to near his lips to hers in the sweetness of the moment, arms pulling her closer.

Meredith registered the movement from the corner of her eyes before she felt it and snapped her head up to look at him admonishingly. Perhaps it was her early catholic indoctrination she had cursed so much, but she had never been for hasty one night stands, not to mention she deemed Damon better off with a friend than another sex partner. Seeing her reaction, Damon rashly changed direction, as much from hurt as much as to mask his initial intentions and closed in on her neck instead, baring his fangs into her neckline on impulse.

"No, no, Damon," Meredith tried to push him away, "I've had vervain, remember?" She ground out, more concerned for him rather than herself.

Expeditiously enough, Damon's head fell back onto the pillow with a groan, his hands clutching his stomach now more than ever, "I forgot. I think I'm drunk," he coughed out.

"It's ok. You only had the smallest amount," the doctor surveyed the base of her neck as much as she could see, then fished in her handbag for a plaster.

"I'm sorry," Damon panted, eyes closing to slits, "maybe you should go," he suggested. Better him rejecting her than the other way round.

Meredith shook her head, but paused a little, unsure of what she should do otherwise, "can you promise you won't do that again if I lay back down with you?"

"I'm not the best of company these days," he narrowed his eyes at her apologetically.

"I wouldn't mind if you were a little perkier, but you're wrong. There aren't many caring and funny people like you in Mystic Falls," she adjusted her position so she could place her head on his arm, leaving her hands plenty of room for manoeuvre to soothe his stomach, taking the massage a lot more gentler this time.

Damon blinked in quick fashion, not used to the heartfelt compliments, "remind me please, have I compelled you or something?"

Meredith sighed, "no. That is your problem Damon, you think so lowly of yourself. Just because people keep putting you down, it doesn't mean they are right. I just feel like going around telling them that."

"Oh, yippy, now I'm a damsel in distress."

"See? What you did there? Putting yourself down? Besides, needing help is part of relationships, it's part of being human."

"Maybe so, but much help this pep talk going to do me?"

Meredith rolled her eyes, "you're doing that other thing. Pushing people away when they wanna help."

Damon pursed his lips, "well, stay if you want. But no more talking."

The doctress opened her mouth to argue, but a glance up told her he had closed his eyes. He looked too tired for a conversation, so she had decided she would just continue rubbing round his bellybutton only. She wasn't sure how much good it was doing till she felt the vampire beside her relax slowly and his breath even out a couple of minutes later. Meredith slowed her hand, gradually coming to a halt on the top of his belly. The woman didn't move yet though, she wanted to be sure he was properly asleep. The physician felt his stomach cramp up under her fingertips again, but it wasn't enough to make him stir. Seeing this, Meredith carefully slid away from her and off the bed. How far should she go for a sleeping vampire not to hear her phone call? The brunette wanted to make sure Damon didn't object when she called in reinforcements.

Tbc


	3. Effort

Chapter 3: Fortress

"Good evening, morning, not sure, I'm sorry if I woke you, this is Meredith Fell."

"I know who you are," Elena was on her guard in an instant. They haven't spoken since the day the doctor had given her Damon's blood unawares and Elena still wasn't certain how she felt about the woman's involvement in her vampirism, but she assumed something had to be amiss if the older brunette called her at this hour, "background doesn't sound like the hospital though? What's wrong?"

"I just thought you should know that Damon is really not well."

"What do you mean?" Elena frowned, taken aback, "Damon is a vampire, he can't be unwell."

Meredith sighed, "look, I got him home from the Grill. He was very drunk and he's not willing to take any blood."

"He can be completely unpredictable when he's drunk, Meredith. You should probably just go, Damon can take care of himself."

"Yeah, probably, he's been doing it for quite a while," Meredith allowed, "but you didn't see the state of him. It's very hard to gloss over. It's like he's fallen apart. He's depressed, dispirited, shaking, pale and looks rather sickly. If not out and out suicidal, but certainly with selfharming tendencies."

Elena bit into her bottom lip, forgetting she was going to draw blood with that force. The young woman had spend the last few hours lying in her bed muddled herself, trying to figure out what being a vampire meant for her. Elena didn't feel like she could be of use, especially of psychological support value to anyone at this moment in time. "Uhm Stefan. Is Stefan not there?"

"I don't know. I assumed maybe you would know."

"Me and Stefan had a few disagreements lately.."

"Which one is his room? I could go look for him."

"No, uhm..he would've heard you if he was around. Hang on," Elena sighed weightily, her instincts on full alert mode, "I'll try out how this speed running works at night."

"So you're coming over?" Meredith felt relief, she knew if Damon listened to anyone, it would be Elena. She also had her doubts though, as at least part of the cause of the problems was the young vampire. "Let me remind you that we need to make sure, as with everybody else in his psychological state who we see at the ER, that he is treated with understanding and compassion, and not bagatellization of his feelings," she tried to explain to the eighteen year old with little expertise in the medical field, "I know you have been through much heartache yourself and you'd expect Damon to be strong, but he's allowed to be weak sometimes as well. I don't see how vampires are all that different from humans in that respect to be honest, as you must know yourself by now. Elena? Are you there?"

"Sorry, I didn't hear what you've said," Elena called from downstairs, phone safely tucked into her pocket while running. She was a little out of breath, forgetting she didn't even need to do that. "I just thought I'd better get here fast instead off talking," she stood before Meredith on the top landing of the stairs.

"Good idea," Meredith agreed, getting her thoughts together on how to educate the younger woman on the treatment of depression without sounding patronising.

Elena however, was already peeking into Damon's room. "He's out of it and doesn't look well," she concluded, but decided on whispering nevertheless, "are you sure he hasn't been in a fight with a hybrid or a werewolf?" The young brunette asked worriedly.

"I didn't get that impression at all. But by what I've gathered he's been like this for a long time. Hiding pain, self harming to dull it and getting himself up to strength whenever you needed him. I've gathered as much from Ric, but tonight I've seen it first hand."

Elena blew out the air shakily, "I know that nothing's right, but I didn't know about this! How can I sort everything out Meredith, how?" The Gilbert girl called exasperated, making the doctor doubt it was a good idea calling her.

"Look, at the moment, all I'd like to achieve is to convince him to feed regularly, he's only making himself feel worse. We will deal with the rest together, this kind of state is not something people can just snap out of, so we will have to work on it."

Elena shook her head vehemently, "no. It's me. It's my fault. Vampires are supposed to be a hundred percent healthy, no chemical imbalances in the brain."

"But the heightened emotions.."

"The emotions are heightened, except they are based on normal feelings. I have done everything wrong, everything I said I wouldn't do. I became his second Katherine. I kept him around, I encouraged him, I spent time with him, I even told them I wanted both of them and then tried to shake him off at the last minute. What did I think he was supposed to feel? I didn't. I had so much to deal with, so much Meredith! I can't do this, I can't do everything right!"

Meredith frowned. Another breakdown, a baby vamp's breakdown is not what she was aiming for. "If you think you've wronged him, you should apologise. It would help both of you, I think."

Elena unclenched her fists, settling for a decision, "I will. First thing after he wakes up. I'll just stay with him till then so I can do it as quickly as possible."

"That's good," Meredith agreed, finally seeing some progress in the situation, "I'd keep a couple of blood bags nearby if I was you, he needs them badly. Let me know how it goes," she gathered her jacket and bag, "and remember, you can call me any time if either of you need anything."

"Thank you so much Meredith," Elena hugged her in her extremely heightened gratitude she didn't quite learn how to keep in control yet, then turned towards Damon's room, already saddened to the extreme by the sight of his miserable expression.

Tbc


	4. Renovation

Chapter 4: Renovation

Raptured into the world of compassion and yet another whirlwind of intense feelings she had never experienced before, Elena felt herself being pulled to Damon and wanting to ease his suffering immediately. She climbed onto the bed before she knew what she was doing and lay next to the older vampire in a way she could put her arms around him.

Damon moaned in response to the urging touch and blinked his eyes open to see what the disruption was. Confusion followed while he had decided it had to be something wrong with the picture of Elena's face so close to him he could barely see more than her nose and drew back, using an elbow for support as he jumped back to the far side of the bed. "Elena?"

"Meredith called me," the young woman explained, "she told me you were behaving insensible."

"Where's Stefan?" Damon groaned. He wasn't very keen on his brother finding his girlfriend in his bed.

"I'm assuming he ran to Caroline to sulk," Elena shrugged, "she's supposed to be my best friend, yet she's proving to be so understanding towards him whenever we have a disagreement."

"I'm not sure I'm the best person for couple-counselling Stefan's girlfriends," Damon grumbled, yet searched her face for signs of distress.

"I'm not here for that Damon," Elena assured him, "what happened to you? Meredith said you were at the bar insisting on drinks for Ric. Do you miss him that bad? How are you doing?"

Damon sighed, "I'm fine. I have a lot of experience losing people," he declared, "all you have to do is stay drunk or in some other altered state till it doesn't hurt that much anymore."

"So you call hunger an enjoyable altered state?" She mocked him.

"Meredith talks too much," Damon protested.

"She has proved to be a good friend to Ric and everyone," Elena insisted.

"Does that mean you don't mind her turning you a vampire now?"

Elena shrugged, "the emotions..they are so all over the place. Sometimes I hate myself for what I am and sometimes I'd like to ride with the vultures up there, rocketing up to ride a surge of ecstasy that tells me the world's beautiful and open for discovery. I have given up on figuring out that one for now."

Damon smiled, liking the direction she had been going. "Wise decision." He wanted to compliment her on it further, but a stomach cramp made him pant and lean back on the pillow behind him, the hand that never left his belly tightening its grip.

"Fancy you talking about wise when you don't even follow your own advice on vampirism. What happened with you-must-feed-from-the-vein-as-a-proper-vampire speech?"

"I'm on it," Damon considered. He didn't like the idea of Elena seeing him as weak psychologically, wasn't he supposed to be her rock. Holding onto his midsection, he turned round to hop off his bed, easier said than done in his still drunken, feeble state. The moving about unbalanced him and he only managed a few steps just past his bedpost before he swayed dangerously, his head swimming with a nauseating throbbing, prompting Elena to speedjump to his aid.

Damon closed his eyes to dull the ache, but was determined to carry on to his cellar for an overdue dose of blood, not seeing the girl jump in front of him and colliding with Elena's full speed. The collision's energy threw both of them to the floor in a confusing tangle that had them logroll over to take control of their limbs. The Salvatore grunted, aware how the young woman's knees dug into his aching stomach and took hold of her shoulders to turn her and under himself, avoiding the harm the pull of gravity paired up with her otherwise featherweight did to his midsection.

"Are you ok?" Elena asked, looking up. Her breath was caught in her throat, preventing her from talking any more as she found herself staring into those ocean blue eyes from probably the closest range ever. Not able to blink, or look away, she was only instinctually cognisant that his mouth would've been just as close, if not closer. Windows to his soul, she marvelled at the adoration directed in her direction in his eyes, caught in an unguarded moment, revealing that he lived, thought and breathed only for her. Pure and vibrant as they were, hurt and the shadow of the past loomed in from behind the crystal shine and Elena felt the entire weight of his destiny all of a sudden, swept over by the uncontrolled compassion of newbie vampire magnitudes. This man she would help at all costs with whatever he needs and right now that would be her comfort she chose to give in the form of nearing her lips to his. As close as their lips have been, they never touched. Elena was baffled for a moment how that could've happened, but the angry voice of Stefan gave her the explanation soon enough.

"Get off her!" Stefan flew after his brother he had thrown into the wall, taking a stake out his inside jacket pocket on his way that he buried under Damon's ribs as far as it would go before Elena could jump up from the floor.

"He hasn't done anything!" The young vampire lurched to pull Stefan away from Damon, not an easy task when the stronger vampire was dead bent on punishing his brother for hitting or maybe even attacking his girlfriend and pulled out the stake just to bury it once more in the older Salvatore's stomach. Elena gave up on tugging and buried his fangs into Stefan's neck from the back, surprising him to a considerable extent, enough to allow for him to take into consideration something that distracted him from battering the unresponsive mess that was Damon.

"I came here to talk to Damon, I approached him and I kissed him," Elena insisted, trying to make sure Stefan was clear on the fact that Damon was innocent and did not deserve his beating..

Stefan whirled back, staring, "why?" He enquired cautiously.

"He needed my help," Elena claimed, glancing in Damon's direction worriedly. He was bleeding badly, his face pale, his eyes closed.

"And could you tell me just when does helping Damon include kissing him?" Stefan looked at his on and off girlfriend suspiciously.

"He looked like he needed it," Elena winced, knowing how unintelligible it may have sounded, "you know how changeable my emotions are right now Stefan, you understand that, don't you? One moment I laugh, next moment I cry. I was..I was just following my instincts. I'm sorry, but please don't take it out on him, it is me you should be mad at."

Stefan pursed his lips, nodding, composing himself. He was no longer a wild animal out of control, but rather one encaged and angry, bottling up wrath for when he would be set free. He stood at full height, his expression rigid as he stared at her, "when you told me you would spend eternity with me, was that also just one of your momentary feels?"

"Let me help Damon first," Elena tried to both sidestep Stefan and the question, but her arm was twisted by Stefan's older vampire force as he made her look at him. "Was that moment we had on the roof simply a product of your newbie vampire impulses?" He asked slowly, weightily. "What is it you feel about me now?"

"You just staked your brother unconscious, how is it I should feel about you other than disgusted and hostile?" Elena countered feistily, caught up in protecting Damon mode.

Stefan drew back, sobering. His girlfriend had been acting influenced by her emotions, so out of control just after turning, he out of all people should understand that. Only he fine well knew Elena had increasingly been harbouring emotions for Damon before turning as well. Not sure he would be able to control his own emotions, he let go of the girl and hurried out for a quiet place to think, a sympathetic ear to listen, a bias woman to look for advice to. He had no Lexi, but Caroline was so similar.

Elena jumped to Damon with a racing pulse. Her brain told her there was nothing to be worried about as the older vampire would recover with a bit of blood, but her heart still insisted on concern. Wasting some impractical moments, her hand reached out to his face, drawn by its unnatural pallor and vulnerability. Her eyes looked him up and down nervously settling on the considerable wounds and she wanted to make all his pain hers. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, she willed herself to snap out of the encompassing feels and speedmove down the cellar and up as quickly as she could, gathering an armful of bloodbags. As the movement made her head clear a little, Elena now set to gently raise his head and start to pour the contents of the plastic containers into his mouth hardly minding that most of it ended up on the floor and very little was swallowed. It was vampire instinct that made Damon take some of the fluid at first, but as soon as he was consciously aware of his body, he rolled to his side, curling up on himself, protecting his middle.

"No, Damon, let me get that stake out," Elena tried to remove his hands out the way, "I thought it would cause more bleeding if I took it out earlier but it should be ok now, isn't that right?" She hesitated, after all Damon would know better. Having no response apart from some faint moaning, Elena gathered his head into her lap and cuddled up his shoulders affectionately, finely tuned to his suffering, "please, let me help you," she cried.

Damon blinked his eyes open at the sound of distress in his voice, never wanting to be the cause of it, "it's okay..you can get it out," he inched his palms away from where it hurt so badly, then nodded up at her encouragingly.

Still new at her vampire strength, Elena underestimated her grip and the stake came out swiftly, making Damon turn grey and shake awkwardly, eyes closing again. This time, it took Elena a few tries before she managed to make him swallow some blood again, but she just stroked his cheek intently till he responded. All the containers were drunk dry before the girl felt his muscles starting to hold his own weight and she could see the blue of his iris shine through the slits between his eyelashes. Elena smiled at him, helping him sit up, still leaning against her. "Does it hurt?" Her gaze went to his hands, stubbornly holding onto the site of the newly closed wounds.

"Not too much," he looked her in the eyes daringly, "Elena, what was all that? I need to teach you control of emotions. You shouldn't cry out the whole Atlantic Ocean at the sight of somebody's pain."

Elena shook her head, "no, I wouldn't. I'm quite sure I wouldn't. I've seen others hurt since I've become a vampire. I've never had this response before. It's only with you, I'm certain," she stared ahead, eyes wide. "Damon, I think it means I love you," she breathed in her uncontrolled style.

"You think." Damon repeated. Was it the bloodloss that was making him dazed still?

"No, no, not just think. I know like I've always known," she raved as if getting a revelation, "becoming a vampire has freed me of inhibitions, whether kicking or screaming or not. What remains is me and my wishes, purely and entirely. I no longer mind what people will say and think about me that much, what was deep down and buried so that I could fit expectations is no longer repressed. This is me, vampire Elena and I love you."

Damon stared at her dubiously, "what was that spur of the moment thing Stefan was talking about? Can't say I was very focussed on the conversation."

Elena took his face in between her hands, "but you did hear what I said right now. As opposed to spur of the moment feelings I have always believed in you and I have always loved you. I was afraid to go there, I was afraid to do so, afraid to embrace vampirism, passion and a tidal wave of feelings I've never experienced before. But now I'm not afraid anymore."

"Let's just see what you say after I teach you control." Hope clearly filling his voice, it would take more than a few words from Elena for him to believe in his luck after almost two centuries of the opposite.

Elena just laughed, "let's." She had nothing to be afraid of.

The End.


End file.
